Is happiness a fickle bitch?
Absolutely every human on the face of this earth would say that all they want is to be happy. Yet, so very few are happy, at least, not all the time. What’s the deal?
In 1985, my life took an abrupt turn in the road. This event was devastating and I over-played the dramatic role for anyone that was listening for way too long. I made myself the victim and the other person the big bad wolf. Later I accepted he was just trying to survive.
That event totally changed my experience of life. I was such a mess and I started looking for answers. I knew I wanted to be happy, but I did not know how to make that happen. I started reading self-help books and went to a counselor. Somewhere in that process I understood that I was totally co-dependant. I’m always being asked what co-dependant means. It means that you/me/most people look for their well-being, happiness outside of themselves usually attaching the responsibility to that person, place, and thing.
What is the difference between me and my. My stuff, my career, my family, my health; without a “me” there is no ‘my”.
In order to draw a circle I have to know where the center is. It’s the same with processing through the stages (passages) of this life. Where is my center?
My human heart is like a hungry snake.
Sixty thousand years ago the Chinese character for the human heart was like this:
For the past 60,000 years since the creation of earth we have been leaving our heavenly home and coming to earth in the form of a human body and we actually have desensitized our true nature to the point of completely forgetting our original home with Heavenly Father. When we first started to come to Earth in our human body, our hearts were pure and we kept our connection to our heavenly home and our creator. Over time our pure hearts became tethered with attachments and desires which were the nature of our human experiences. Now, the Chinese character for the human heart is like this:
This character has a hook attached to the heart.
If you do not believe in multiple lifetimes, that is all good. I would never tell you that what you believe is not right for you. I certainly have and have had many beliefs that I have held to and then my life would take a turn in the road and I found that my beliefs adjusted accordingly. Life is a process that is forever changing. Yea! For the changes!
I’m experiencing more happy moments; my heart is lighter more of the time because I have found my true nature.
Jesus Christ said in one of the scriptures, “Before you were in your mother’s belly, I knew you.” This scripture, to me, clearly states that I existed before I was a human baby.
There is another scripture that says, “You were created in your heavenly father’s likeness.” With DNA what could that mean except to mean that our creator’s likeness is not referring to form, but to his “Perfect Love”. Otherwise, we would all look alike. In our “true nature” we do all look alike, whatever “Perfect Love” looks like. Since “Perfect Love” can’t be seen in form, how can it be seen? For me it’s not seen as much as “felt”.
I feel, what I describe as love when:
I look into the face of babies of all kinds (human, animal, and the like). I also see it mirrored back to me in that moment.
I feel it when I am in the presence of and when I have thoughts of my children, family, and friends.
I feel it looking at sunsets, clouds, trees and snags, flowers, the ocean, rivers, lakes and streams, flora and fauna of all kind, rocks, color, and watching and listening to birds.
I feel it when I witness human kindness and triumph.
I feel it during a summer rain.
I feel it with my little dog curled up against me and watching all her antics.
I feel it appreciating art and the arts being performed and written.
I feel it laughing and goofing with family, friends and co-workers.
I feel it when I realize, in a moment, that I just reacted lovingly when I know that I used to react to the same situation in fear and the “need” to control.
I feel it when I am taught a better way to think, a better way to practice living, a better choice then I knew I had and the knowing I just experienced love that was not of my doing.
I feel it when I am listening to and sharing with my Tao kin at our Tao discussions.
But I feel it most of all when I recite and fall back on the 23 Psalms. It says it all in regard to our creators love, companionship, and constant protection. The meaning of this scripture is two-fold. The writer was describing his relationship with the creator and expressing his belief as to how the reader could also experience God. The other aspect is that all of us human beings are also eternal beings created by God in his likeness which is perfect love and in our natural state, our true nature is love and exists eternally in the state of the kind of peace that green pastures and still waters evoke deep inside of us when our senses experience them. There is the promise of goodness and mercy all the days of our lives and don’t forgot about the abundant table that is set before us. Auntie Mame said, "Life's a banquet, and most suckers are starving to death."