I went to a brunch this weekend with two other women. I love these women and I enjoy their company. I do my share of verbally noting annoyances and there were many annoyances being noted by all of us.
I am determined not to disturb my degree of happiness which is impossible for me to maintain when I am complaining, or just noting, which is complaining. No matter what spin I put on it, it equates to an attitude problem. This is why I am posting this; to remind myself. I can only change myself.
Attitudes are connected to our core values and they are habitual. I came from a family of complainers. Complaining and fault finding was the accepted form of communication. I am finding this habit difficult to deal with and to stop. It is very easy to get caught up with the heat of the complaining.
I understand I must take full responsibility for both my own happiness and spiritual well-being. Material possessions and other people can contribute to my worldly comfort and well-being and perhaps inspire me, but I alone, must develop the right attitudes and values that will provide a deep and abiding joy and contentment regardless of my external circumstances. Complaining is a diversion and I never like the results.
It is possible to maintain serenity of mind no matter what my circumstances are. The more I allow my mind to run unchecked with thoughts that are not really essential the more unsettled my mind becomes. I don’t know about you, but I find it difficult to let go of negative events that have taken place in the past. To secure my happiness I must stand guard over my thinking and not let it get revved up. I have self-reflection techniques that help stop those thoughts and their eventual results which make me feel dark, ugly and right. In this situation the more “right” I am the more “wrong” I am.
So we need to remember that our thoughts create our consciousness and our consciousness determines the way we lead our life. The way we lead our life determines the state of our actions, the results of those actions and the effects those results have on other people.