Tuesday, December 6, 2011


I watched some of the Country Music Awards last night. It screamed out how much our society is hooked on romantic relationships. There was a time when I was also either in one or looking for another one.

The world is set up to go two by two. It always has been and it probably always will be. There is nothing wrong with these kinds of relationships. As long as you are a person that can stay focused on what is important to you and will stick to that even if your partner is not in agreement.

It wasn’t until I got over being codependent that I was able to get a handle on what was important to me. I’m one of those people that always did my partners program. I put my program either aside or lower in importance than their program, except for my children’s father. I was free in that relationship to pursue my interests apart from him and the children. Too bad I ruined that one, which I still have to try to not regret.

In the relationships I’ve had the ability to observe, in most of them there is one dominant personality which determines the program for both. In order to reflect within yourself without conflict, you need to be free of someone else’s controlling influence. Try to cultivate an atmosphere were everyone gets what they want with the complete support of each other. Exactly the way you would treat one of your good friends. If you partner is not your friend, then who are they?

I’m not suggesting you leave your relationship, especially if it is working for you. There is more than one way to be free of your partners control without leaving.

To grow spiritually it takes focus. Too many intimate relationships don’t allow for a person to focus. There are always too many places to go, people to meet, and your partners needs to fulfill. Wow! My head is swirling just mentioning this.

You can actually have peace in your heart being single. You can also have peace when you are not. The purpose of this posting is to help those who are struggling with being single to take heart and take the time to self reflect and make necessary changes for yourself. That way you will not only have peace now, but you will be stronger the next time you enter into a relationship.

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